Second consensus

[twixt_dee_n_dum]

[Tweedledum and Tweedledee may look and sound a bit different from last time, but their speech patterns and personalities have not changed whatsoever.

They're still identical, though, and at the moment, standing back to back, the only way to tell them apart is that one of them is sulking and the other looks like she's about to throw a fit.]

It was mine, you know, and now you've ruined it. That's bad form.

Yes, I suppose it was. Contrariwise, it can't be fixed now.

Nohow. So you'll agree that there's only one thing to be done?

Yes. We must have a battle to set things right.

But you know... [She turns to face her sister.] I don't really want to fight you.

Nor I you. [She turns around as well.]

So there's only one solution.

[The two smile at each other and clasp hands, suddenly and inexplicably excited.]

We must have a game of chess.

The very best game of chess.

Everyone will participate. It would be bad form for them not to, wouldn't you say?

I would. Naturally.

Contrariwise, we'll have to get permission if we want to have enough pieces.

It's impolite to take what's not yours. Which is how this got started in the first place.

['Dee begins to sulk again.] Let's just ask now, shall we.

Yes. Let's.

[And both of them turn to the camera again, beaming.]

Red Queen! We want to play a game!

Comments

[wondershit.livejournal.com]

I'm good at games. My boy and I are fans of chess. The biggest ever. I'm rather good at it myself.

Don't listen to him, I let him win. I let him.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

It's not good to lie, nohow.

[wondershit.livejournal.com]

Contrariwise, I'm not lying.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Then you'll certainly enjoy the show.

There's no way you couldn't, really.

[wondershit.livejournal.com]

Suitable for all ages? G rated? Subby, you know...

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Of course!

If Subby doesn't mind a little violence.

[wondershit.livejournal.com]

Oh no, not at all.

Probably I'd have to hold him back by the hair.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Likes to fight, does he?

What an energetic boy.

Perhaps I'll have him on my team.

Not if I get him first.

[wondershit.livejournal.com]

Nohow, ladies. You see, it won't be manners to drag him into it without the company of his father. We're a pair, we are.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Well we can't have two pieces to a square.

That's unsportsmanlike.

You'll both have to sit it out, then.

[wondershit.livejournal.com]

But I'll be cheering for you ladies. Never forget a pretty face.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Why thank you!

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

Why are you...women? And chess only works with two people.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

We're whatever we want, whenever we want.

And it's a very big board, so we need very big pieces.

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

That's useful.

Oh, you mean we're the pieces. Uhh. Maybe you could use a very small board. With very small pieces. You know, the kind that don't try to run away every now and then.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

No need to worry!

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

...That's actually a little disturbing, you know...

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

What's disturbing is that you thought we wouldn't have thought of that!

Nohow! We've got all of our bases covered!

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

Right, well, good for you, except that I can't fight.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

And who said you'd need to?

Not either of us, that's for sure.

She should listen properly, this one.

Unless she's on my side--

Or mine.

In which case I'd expect her to at least try.

Quite right. She can't expect to get to play and not put some effort into it.

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

...

This won't be fun for me.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Then you aren't trying hard enough.

On second thought, you can have her on your team.

Nohow. I don't want her with that attitude.

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

Hey, that's-! [Mildly insulting.] It's not my fault I wasn't born with... I don't know, a, a talent for making things catch fire!

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Well you should have learned one!

Contrariwise, you could have learned to use a weapon instead.

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

I guess so... I can't imagine ever shooting someone.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Perhaps you should try!

[helena-campbell.livejournal.com]

That's a terrible thing to say.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Not if you want to learn how, it's not.

[onlyredroses.livejournal.com]

[]

Must you? If one and/or both of you is so prone to ruining things, perhaps I shouldn't be trusting you with anything at all.

[]

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

[If either of them notice her annoyance, it doesn't show. They just keep smiling, very pleased with themselves and their idea.]

The bigger the thing, the harder it is to ruin it.

[onlyredroses.livejournal.com]

[]

What are the stakes? If it's only for your own amusement it won't be even close to entertaining enough to warrant my attention or my Mirrors.

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Well for that we'd need your help, wouldn't we?

Seeing as you have all the power in Wonderland, don't you, Red Queen?

[onlyredroses.livejournal.com]

[]

It would have to be something worth fighting for, or there's no motivation on their part. And if that's the case, they won't play as hard without something like that.

[]

Very well. You may take your choice of Mirrors and Real Things for my amusement, and you shall have my assistance for the prizes. I will not give the Real Things what they truly desire if they win, but second best will have to do - should they win, I will restore one life to them. And of course, if my Mirrors were to win, I would allow them to become Real Things.

[]

[twixt-dee-n-dum.livejournal.com]

Oooh! How generous!

Contrariwise, if the Mirrors win, you get a new set of mirrors! How exciting!

[The two of them look at each other again and grin. What fun this will be.]